Am I overly procrastinating?

This last month has been a big hard-to-define blur to me.

Know that feeling?

I have had a constant feeling of ‘procrastinating’ – like I’m at a standstill – I know where I need to go, I know what I need to do, but can’t find my way there.

I’m in the middle of certification, my grandfather died and I went home for a week+, we have had house guests and I just can’t seem to find my ‘groove’ again. 

I think a perfect metaphor would be a maze. I’m in the maze and can’t find my way out. Of course there’s a way, of course there is. I can almost smell it, see it, sense it – but I just can’t get there.

Yesterday I decided to look into the science behind this as I thought maybe there is something deeper to this feeling… perhaps a link between creativity and procrastination.

Sure enough, I came across a TED Talk by professor of psychology Adam Grant, and his studies show that people who moderately procrastinate are 16% more creative than pre-crastinators (his term for the opposite).

In fact some of the greatest originals of all times – Edison, Bach, and Mozart e.g. - were procrastinators, according to Professor Grant. And in their times of procrastination new ideas were born, lots of them. Some worked, most didn’t - but they never quit.

These days I tend to daydream A LOT... am I overly procrastinating, or am I just practicing the moderate ‘16% version’?

Well, I can’t stop obsessing over our upcoming Mexican vacation, though it's still 4 months out. It’s the kind of trip that my husband and I never got to take after our wedding. I also think about starting a family and buying a house. I imagine what I want my coaching practice to look like, feel like and what I’ll be doing there. What kind of clients I’ll be working with, the seminars I’ll be speaking at, the workshops I’ll be hosting. This is a vision that’s shaping up in my mind – it’s beautiful – it’s rich, yet I can’t stop beating myself up over how much more productive I “should” be.

I find myself going in circles and in that head space I’m not the nicest and easiest to myself. You been there too?

Why don’t we give ourselves some leeway and allow ourselves to step into this seemingly gray zone. It involves stumbling, fumbling and moments of feeling unsure of one self, and yet a lot of goodness can happen here.

To me, this seems to be the beauty of 'moderate procrastination'.

Sending Sunshine,